President Donald Trump celebrated the news that the Dow Jones Industrial Average hit 30,000 Tuesday morning despite the ongoing coronavirus pandemic.
“That’s a sacred number, 30,000,” Trump said. “Nobody thought they’d ever see it.”
The president noted that it was the ninth record jump since the beginning of 2020 and the forty-eighth time that the stock market had broken records during his administration.
“I just want to congratulate all the people within the administration that work so hard, and most importantly, I want to congratulate the people of this country because there are no people like you,” he said.
Trump attributed the jump to the successful development of coronavirus vaccines.
“I’m very thrilled with what’s happened on the vaccine front. That’s been absolutely incredible,” he said. “Nothing like that has ever happened medically and I think people are acknowledging that, and it’s having a big effect.”
The president only spoke for about one minute and four seconds before leaving the podium without taking questions.
The abrupt exit prompted one baffled reporter to reply, “Well that was weird as shit.”
Author: Charlie Spiering